Our travels are over. The adventure has ended. For now. We have returned home. Well, to be
accurate, we've returned to the city where our stuff is. Let's call
it home, for short. For many reasons; the main one being that we are
not independently wealthy, our current wandering lifestyle has come
to a close. For now. Not forever. Just for now. I say that with
confidence, because we learned some things on this trip. We learned
some stuff about ourselves. About our family.
We learned that we were great at traveling. Of course we were,
that was the fun part, right? Going to new places. Exploring cool
stuff. Awesome sights. Amazing scenic views. That stuff was easy.
Fun. Except, that stuff was only like 10% of traveling. Tops. There's
still the other 90% worth of stuff you have to do. Like get to the
amazing views. They're not all right next to each other. The Midwest
and mountain states are vast. And by vast, I mean... well, vast. Lots
of vast car time. Mix in some random potty breaks. More vastness.
Never-ending hungry children. More vastness. And then, some cool
stuff to look at. At the end of the vast day, we still needed a place
to sleep. Preferably a place with free breakfast. And a pool. And hot
tub. That's mostly what traveling was. It was figuring out how to
move the whole family around. It was finding stuff to see, and then
finding a place to stay. It was logistics. And that stuff, the
logistics, that's what we were good at. Surprisingly good in some
instances.
We moved around well. When you consider we essentially had a
mini version of our lives with us, that was no small feat. All told,
we packed in and out of 25 different places. People's houses. Guest
houses. Hotel rooms. Cabins. We traveled pretty light. Or so we
thought. We were only allowed one suitcase of clothes each. Once you
added in the kitchen bin, the school bin, the toy bin, and the
cooler, we still managed to fill hotel luggage carts to the top. Mini
versions of your life is still a lot. Even so, we ran a tight ship.
With all that moving around, in and out, the unpacking and repacking,
we didn't leave one thing behind. Nothing. We didn't lose anything.
Nothing important, anyways. Kids losing their crappy, little toys
doesn't count. That's actually a blessing. Random socks don't count
either. They magically disappear at home. No, I'm talking about the
stuff you always leave behind. Chargers. Favorite stuffies. Jewelry.
Valuable things. We didn't leave a one behind. We were a well run
machine. Organized. Streamlined. Even being faced with a crippling
foot injury didn't slow us down. The caravan moved well.
We were resourceful. We perfected the skill of hotel room cooking. Most nights on
the road we stayed in and cooked. Armed with our induction burner,
and cast iron skillet, we were set. Even though it was way more work,
it was healthier and obviously cheaper. There are a fair number of
skills we learned to cooking in a hotel room. Always do it in the
bathroom. With the fan on. You don't want to be the one that sets off
the smoke detectors just cause you wanted some quesadillas. Use the
toilet as a garbage disposal. It works great. Also, anything goes for
a dining table. Same holds true for plates. We were creative.
Practical. Almost masters by the end of the trip.
Surprisingly, we learned we were good at being in the car. For the
most part. We drove over 7,500 miles in all. We visited 14 states.
Seven National Parks and Monuments. We probably spent about 200 hours
together, jammed into our Honda Odyssey. And it wasn't horrible. It
didn't completely suck. That in itself is a victory, right? The
driving was not the worst part of traveling. It could have easily
been. Whiny kids. Carsickness. Getting lost,and driving aimlessly. It
could have been a nightmare. But it wasn't. We managed to keep the
kids pretty well entertained. Lots of audiobooks. Car games. We
listened to the kids album
Philadelphia Chickens over 400
times. Let me tell you, it takes a pretty special album to still be
enjoyed after 400 times. This, however, was not that album. Sometimes
we just sat and stared out the windows. We talked about what we just
saw. What we were going to see. We sang. We slept. Sure, some times
there was fighting, but, for the most part, the car time was great.
There weren't even that many cases of “are we there yet?” Some.
Just not a lot. We got good at finding ways for the kids to blow off
some pent up car energy. Indoor swimming pools. Playgrounds when it
was warm. Play-lands when it got cold. We even ran laps inside a rest
area lobby for 20 minutes one frigid day. Blowing off steam was
crucial to a happy van full of kids. We learned how to be good at
that. Early on, we also figured out what everyone's car meltdown
threshold was. It was usually somewhere around six hours. After six
hours, all hell typically broke loose. So, our answer, was to keep
our driving times shorter than that each day. And that worked, too.
Nadia only felt really carsick once the whole trip. And that was
coming down Pike's Peak. By the end of the trip, she wasn't even
mentioning feeling bad anymore, and she even colored for a few hours.
Not normal carsick behavior.
We were great travelers. The gypsy life was indeed for us. We
would find fun stuff to do if we wanted. Or we would do nothing at
all. We would hang out with friends, or set off to explore our
surroundings. It was perfect. Except when it wasn't.
Not everything we learned about our family was positive. The
reality was, that just because we were off having great adventures,
didn't mean that our regular problems magically went away. We were
still the same family, with the same issues. Sibling rivalry still
existed. Jealousy and pettiness was still there. Being at a National
Park, didn't stop people from getting their feelings hurt. Being on a
mountain top didn't exempt arguments from happening. Meltdowns
happened in hotel rooms just like they did at home. Scenic overlooks
didn't prevent us from yelling at the kids for getting their feelings
hurt, getting into arguments, and having meltdowns. No, the same
family dynamics and frictions still existed on the road. The same
drama still flared up. Just with better backdrops.
In fact, as the trip wore on, some of the drama intensified.
Maybe it was all the time we were spending together in close
quarters. Or maybe it was something else. The girls started feeling
more anxious at times. Restless at others. 'I just need to squeeze
something!' they would say. Also, their emotions were running even
more hot and cold than their standard level of bat shit crazy. They
couldn't articulate it, but they were trying to tell us something. We
figured it out. The girls were feeling insecure. They need to feel
safe. They needed a place to call home. As much fun as they were
having, deep down, they needed a home. When we set out on this trip,
it was never meant to be forever. Maybe in some fantasy we had, we
thought we could live like this always. Some families do. Maybe we
dreamed a little that our kids would grow into these super cool world
travelers who never needed a real home. We'd have some family motto,
like “As long as we're together.” We'd sell all of our stuff from
our storage locker and hit the road indefinitely. We knew there was
no way this was going to happen. Not our family. Not our kids. Our
kids are adventurous. Sure. You could even say they are somewhat of
free spirits. But, they also need to be grounded. Sometimes I forget
that. I forget how young they are. I forget how fragile they can be.
They are sweet, yet very emotional kids. I'm glad they are. But, with
that, also comes the need for a sense of belonging. A sense of space.
A home. I get that. It's normal. Natural. They can't feel safe to
explore the world, without having stability and security at home.
So, after 138 days, our houseless-ness is over. We move into a
short-term rental house soon, and once again will have a place to
call our home. Does that mean our wandering days are over? No way.
The traveling part is easy for us, remember? We're already discussing
our plans for this summer. There's a lot more of this country still to see. It probably won't be a 4 ½ month
adventure this time, but it also won't be just a week, either.
That's not how we wander.